Big Fat Pussy Girl

tatiana de la tierra

Hello.  My name is tatiana de la tierra and I have a fat pussy.

I didn’t always know that that’s what I had.  What I had was a creature between my legs that always wanted attention.  She expected to be stroked and talked to.  Demanded to be taken on outings.  Insisted on being entertained.  Roared until she was well-fed.

I took care of my panocha as well as I could.  I became friends with her, got to know her well.  I introduced her to my friends.  Hi, I’m tatiana, and this is my pussy.  Now don’t get me wrong, I protected my papaya.  No soliciting, no door-to-door salesmen.  But I let her go out, make acquaintances of her own. I took her to the movies—she liked Italian ones best.  I took her to rock and roll concerts, to the beach—she loved playing in the ocean.

I petted her a lot, especially at night.  She would get in bed with me and start whining.  Hhhhhh touch me, touch me… So I touched her and touched her and touched her and touched her and TOUCHED her.  And as she drifted off to sleep I would sing to her.

Pa-pa-pa-pa-panochita ven conmigo mamita….

And I fed her.  She was a pretty hungry little cunt.  I started simple, natural.  Fingers.  One, two, three, four.  She always wanted more.  It wasn’t about quantity, though, it was about quality and variety.  So I had to go out hunting and gathering.  I fed her:  quartz crystals, Classic Coca-Cola bottles, Greek cucumbers, fat cocks, Italian eggplants, bones, tongues, lavender dildos, hands and fingers of all kinds, candles, and some odds-and-ends—a bottle of mosquito repellent, the head of a Mexican doll, my great great grandparent’s bedpost.

I kept my papaya satisfied to the best of my ability.  But then something happened.

You see, my panocha was my panocha.  I made all the decisions.  I scripted all the permissions, directed the action, took responsibility for the results.  And then this diesel dyke got a hold of her—this stone butch, she just took over. I had to give up the property rights at that point.  Well, I wanted to.  Because this woman, she could take care of me and my pussy all by herself.

This is what happened.  Me, my cunt, and Margarita—that’s her name—we started getting intimate.  And Margarita would say stuff to me, like, Ay mami, que rica que tu eres.  And she’d be kissing on me and touching and swooning and I let her.  And she’d be exploring me with her questions and with her tongue and with her nose and with her fingertips and when her fingers finally got there, right there to my cunt, ahí, ahí, Margarita said, Papayona, mira esta papaya tan sabrosa que tienes…Papayona.

Papayona.  Big fat pussy.  She said it.  She named it.  I didn’t just have any pussy.  I had a big fat pussy.  And this was a good thing.  Papayona.  Bigger, softer, better.  Papayona.  Wider, deeper, wetter.  Panochota, 3X double-wide extra padded. Chochachona.  Big fat pussy. Queen-size cunt.  A whaler of a cunt, the cruise ship of cunts, the World Wide Web of cunts, the Cadillac of cunts, the castle of cunts, the eagle of cunts, the Jupiter of Cunts.  Papayona.  The Library of Congress of cunts.  Papayona.  The Disney World of Cunts.  Papayona.  The Sonora Matancera of Cunts.

Los invitamos a vivir emociones de otros  tiempos. Señoras y Señores, Ladies and Gentlemen, I have the immense pleasure of presenting to you the Dean of Cunts, the world-wide famous Sonora Papayona with original arrangements and the best digital sound, con ustedes, la Sonora Papayona, the grand orchestral pussy of the 21st century.

Pa-pa-pa-papayona, que ricura chingona
Pa-pa-pa-panochota, una tremenda nota
Cho-cho-cho-chocha chochona que niñita tan mona

Big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl

Got the fattest shiniest pearl
Got the deepest oiliest well
Got the sweetest lingering smell
Got the prettiest prettiest shell
Got the prettiest prettiest shell

Big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl
Big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl, big fat pussy girl

12 de agosto de 2001, 1:48 a.m., buffalo, nueva york

Originally published:

de la tierra, tatiana. “Big Fat Pussy Girl.” Porcupine Love and Other Tales from My Papaya.  Buffalo:  Chibcha Press, 2005.  5.  Also recorded as:  “Big Fat Pussy Girl.”  Vagina Dialogues: A Queer Review. Compact disc recording. Hag Theatre, 2002.